Even if you veer from tradition, you should tell your parents first and in person if at all possible. Not only is this the most respectful route (and you’ll want to start your marriage off on the right foot with both sides!), but it’s also more fun to see Mom and Dad’s full reactions.
By Phone
The next most personal and immediate way to tell the rest of your family and friends is by telephone, but of course it may not be practical to call everyone. To determine whose numbers to dial, ask yourself if the individual in question would be hurt if not contacted.
If this is a second marriage for either party and there are children from the first marriage, they, and most often the former spouse, should be the first to hear the news. Then move on to parents, immediate family—particularly siblings and grandparents—and closest friends.
Through Email
The quicker, easier way to announce your impending nuptials is to draft an instant message. If you have out-of-town friends with whom you usually communicate via e-mail, then it’s perfectly acceptable to announce your engagement to them this way. Keep in mind, though, that some people prefer to hear big news over the phone, so if there is even the slightest possibility that someone you know will be offended, put him or her on your “to-call” list.
